What did Mr. Smudg find this week? A surprise package… and not the kind anyone wants to unwrap.
There are days in the laundry trenches when Mr. Smudg wonders if perhaps he missed his true calling, a crime scene investigator.
A hazmat specialist
Or possibly a therapist for traumatized linens.
This week, he reached into a load of what should have been towels. Soft. Innocent. Predictable.
Instead, his hand brushed up against something… puffy?
Something… crinkly?
Something that had absolutely no business being there.
An. Adult. Diaper.
Filled with pee.
Now, let’s be clear: Mr. Smudg is not here to judge life choices, aging bodies, or surprise bodily functions.
He is, however, here to ask the real question:
“Why… why for the love of thread count… would you… launder it?”
It was used.
It was folded like someone tried to be polite.
It was marinating.
Mr. Smudg stood frozen, staring into the abyss (aka the 40-gallon laundry bin) wondering if his soul could, in fact, be bleach-washed.
He’d seen things.
He’d smelled things.
He’d touched things.
But nothing prepares you for a rogue adult diaper doing laps in a high-efficiency wash cycle like it owns the place.
This week’s life lesson:
Toiletry items: not washable.
Diapers: disposable for a reason.
Mr. Smudg’s patience: officially on backorder.
So if you’re out there, a brave hotel guest who sent a surprise bomb into the linen mix—Mr. Smudg sees you.
And he has questions.
And lots of trauma.
Until next week,
Mr. Smudg
Still here. Still grumpy. Still recovering from the crinkle of doom.
#MrSmudg #LaundryChronicles #DiaperDisaster #HousekeepingHumor #NotEverythingIsMachineWashable
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